Hello Qurious Readers!
Over the weekend, Inside Out 2 hit over $1 BILLION in sales worldwide. This makes me SO excited and hopeful…people across the globe are clamoring to watch a movie about EMOTIONS! Yahoo! For the two people who may not know about Inside Out 2, it is the sequel to the original that came out in 2015. This movie is so layered and relatable for youth and adults alike. I contributed to that $1 billion and went with my partner and two children (11 and 15) to the movie. It is the gift that keeps on giving. I am overflowing with wonderings, ideas and tons of EQuriosity!
Complex emotion characters were introduced in the film (Anxiety, Embarrassment, Envy and Ennui). Emotions that many of us experience as uncomfortable and attempt to avoid and suppress at all costs! The movie shows that ALL emotions are not only welcome, but a part of our overall well-being--they are equal and vital members of the team.
How do we practice welcoming, accepting and learning from uncomfortable emotions? (Which, let me be clear, can be ANY emotion!) It starts with naming and describing them.
I picked up my 11 year old from gymnastics and asked her the usual. “How did practice go?” She responded, “It was ok (her tone told me otherwise). I feel a bit bad because Kyra (her gymnastics bestie) got extra time to work on her tumbling passes. I wanted to have more time too, but didn’t get it. What’s so special about her?” Her tone was laced with a tinge of anger and shame. Then she paused, gasped a bit and said “I am feeling envy.” A sense of relief washed over her when she was able to name and describe the emotion she was feeling. Makes sense--her friend was getting the attention that she wanted (and thought she deserved). She was able to visually see Envy and welcome her into the space, exactly what she needed to move through it. (And yes, I was beaming with joy and pride at the connection she made!) It’s these micro moments of awareness and practice that build on themselves over time. And I will have LOTS of moments to practice with her (I’ll be doing my work too!) as she cruises into puberty…just like Riley!
Where has Envy showed up for me lately? I live with an educator who has summers off and children who have the summer “off". Guess who does not have the summer off? Envy gets really loud and big when I am the only one who has to get up in the morning and work all day. I realized Envy was starting to take over and negatively impact my interactions with my partner and children. Since I’ve named it and shared it with trusted friends, it feels less potent and I am better able to accept that she is there, but does not have control of my internal motherboard.
Where might Envy be showing up in your life? Name it. Describe it. Stay with the uncomfortable feeling. This is how we practice social emotional learning skills and build our emotional intelligence. One feeling at a time.
Until next time…stay EQurious!
|
|